As a child of God, even when you take a detour on your journey, know that God is working it out for your good.
Again, Rabby's contributions will be written in Italics and Barry's will be in bold, to make following easier for everyone. First of all, we really appreciate the feedback from the previous posts… This is a blessing to us as much as it is to you. In the last blog post, we shared a general overview of the growing pains we went through at the onset of our relationship.We should’ve been done with this by now… but don’t worry – we’ll fit the rest of the story in this blog post… so brace yourself it may be a long one!
To refresh your memory, Barry and I were about to start a relationship, but it ended before it could even begin. In that period of being strangers, I was very bitter and hurt, considering the fact that he broke my heart (Jeez! Let it go, eh?) and generally threw a tantrum at God. A mutual friend of Barry and I (called Samir) had a very lengthy conversation that enlightened me on what was going on. After I had poured out my heart, and ranted about how Barry was being very rash and immature, Samir said:
God has put this wedge between you and Barry, so that you two will love Him and be grateful to Him for each other, instead of loving Him and being grateful to Him because of each other.
If Samir and I hadn’t had this conversation, I probably wouldn’t have gotten the full impact of that season. A lot of times, children of God grieve about the seemingly strenuous or painful seasons in our lives, without deciphering the reason for which we are in such a season. After Samir and I spoke, I realized how God should’ve been my focus in the first place. My attention was also drawn to the fact that I was very ready to give Barry 1stplace in my life even before he assumed the position of a boyfriend. God knew that if we had started the relationship at that time, Barry would not be a partner to my destiny, but would become an idol and no good would have come out of our relationship. With this new mindset, I began to pray more and press deeper into God. Just to add on, God doesn’t like to have competition. Anything that takes His place in your life becomes ‘god’ to you. You’ll be amazed at how He will eliminate this ‘god’ in no time. Let God always be #1 and all others can fight for the #2 position downwards on your priority list.
Now, don’t misunderstand us – we are well past this time in our lives and have a clearer understanding as to the “whys” and such. But at the time of living through these situations we didn’t have it all figured out. I was hurting as well, but in a far less dramatic way than Ewurabena was.
Here’s my side of the story:
After we went our separate ways, I felt like I had had enough relationship/girl drama to last me a longtime. I knew I had the calling of God on my life, and the chain of events seemed like distractions that were setting me in the wrong direction. I had gotten hurt from a bad relationship and I felt it was time take care of me. So, I obeyed what I strongly felt was God’s leading and cut her off.
God took me on a journey that led to a lot of growth in my spiritual life. It was like a crash course on love, trust and humility. I found myself reading a lot on these topics, listening to sermons and ended up learning so much in a very short time. It was in this same period of time that God prepared me to take off in my ministry as well, so I was solely focused on doing exploits and positioning myself in the right place to receive divine instructions from God for ministry.
In retrospect, these life lessons and the growth I experienced was for my future; specifically, my relationship with Ewurabena. Also, the conviction to walk away from her, and the desire to win her back were all divinely placed for our own good. I soon realized that I needed her more than I could imagine (Haaaarrrd guy ) The desire to be with her fueled continuous prayer for her and through prayer, I fought to get her back.
At the time Barry and I started talking again, I had “moved on with my life’ on the outside but inside, I was conflicted within me about what was happening around me. I was confused because I still had to deal with certain thoughts and feelings when (or after) we interacted. (Well, what can I say? I can’t help it.) Again, to help me in this process, I was blessed to have the most amazing roommates anyone could ask for. My roommates and I had a Hot Seat session in our room, and the messages that were given to me were very timely. In my heart, what I needed help understanding was whether or not I was at the right place in life, and what steps I should take in the right direction, if need be. The message I got from that prayer session concerning my “relationship wahala” was this: Hope in God. It didn’t mean anything in relation to Barry and I then, but when I laid down all my cares and worries and focused on pleasing God and loving Him, I saw, the pieces of my life that I thought would never come together were where they needed to be from the very beginning
God has a special way of teaching us once we allow Him. He prepares us for a journey without our knowledge (most of the time). Without even trying, Ewurabena and I had rekindled our friendship, and the rest, they say, is history.
You may not be going through this situation, but you may find yourself in a peculiar season that seems to frustrate you. Let God be #1 and allow Him to be God in your life. The pains may be there to teach you something. You need to figure out what God wants you to learn and once you learn it, you will be strengthened for your future and your walk with Him. Also, never cease to learn new things through the Bible, sermons, spirit-led discussions and fellowship with the Holy Spirit.
<<<Aside: “Hot Seat” It is a form of intercessory prayer, where one person sits in a chair (the hot seat) in the middle of gathered saints, and is prayed for. Usually regarding a specific topic or situation in their lives, or a general prayer. After a few minutes of prayer for the person, whatever message from God that was heard or seen concerning the person is shared either to everyone’s hearing or directly; depending on the sensitivity and such.>>>
That’s all we have for you today! See you on the next blog post!
[First published on 1st March 2017]